The Events That Defined New York City Skateboarding in 2012: 10-6 + 2013 Predictions

lou ruining skateboarding

70% chance of snow for the last weekend of 2012. New Year’s Eve plans? Nets head coach suggestions? Indoor skate spot recommendations? Highest bidder for an unauthorized House of Vans key duplicate? Who’s excited for the new season of Girls? Previously: #s 25-21, 20-16, 15-11. Expect 5-1 on New Year’s Eve.

10. Lurker Lou Ruins Skateboarding

Skateboarders hate everything. It becomes more evident by the day, as the anonymity provided by Hella Clips comments supplants the Slap forum as the skateboard internet’s epicenter of negativity. But we won’t stand for that negativity in our reality shows! This past spring, Lurker Lou — who, looking at it as objectively as possible, didn’t “hate” *that* bad — spewed his bearded criticisms on a bunch of youngsters looking to “make it” via the “One in a Million” reality show fiasco. He hurt feelings, crushed dreams, snapped boards and ruined any fun there was to be had in riding a skateboard for the remainder of human existence, which unfortunately, did not end on December 21st. (No existence is better than existence on an earth with Lou.)

What a jerk!

9. Gino Pushes, Does Not Go Grocery Shopping (As Far As We Know)

Above is a compilation of all 2012 Gino sightings.

“I’d rather see Gino push!” You spoke and the management team(s) behind the east coast’s marquee cult skater listened. 2012 was Gino’s most visible year since the Epicly Later’d episodes aired. There was no follow-up to Yeah Right!‘s redemption story, but you got a minute-long commercial predominantly focused on pushing (!!!), a 14-second skatepark commercial, an artsy commercial with a Kurosawa/Mifune riff, and a few clips in Pretty Sweet. For a guy whose fans would be content with pushes, Gino overachieved in 2012.

8. L.E.S. Park Re-Opens, Wins the Battle Against Rats…for now

While the construction of a circular flowing skatepark in New York remains to be seen, we won’t diminish the value of small victories. It was an unfathomable task just seven months ago, but the team behind this park got rid of the compost piles, and won the battle against what was likely the most rat-infested skatepark in the history of skateparks. For the moment (New York rats are notorious for their perseverance), chalk it up as the greatest victory of the New York skatepark construction boom.

7. Zoo Doesn’t Re-Sign Zered

As skateboarding’s laypeople, it’s tough to know what really goes on behind the scenes. We’re left to message board conspiracy theories, angry after-the-fact interviews, and games of telephone from a friend of a friend who’s a sales rep for so-and-so. Remember, when the news first broke, it got misconstrued to the point where everyone was supposedly off Zoo (see above.) But not re-signing the guy who has largely been responsible keeping the company relevant for the past decade (who’s still in his twenties and uh, sorta good at skating), seems like a bone-headed move.

6A. Gonyon Backside Flips the Flushing Six

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This should not have been casually tossed into a montage for three seconds.

Any chance of a Gonyon KCDC video + 56k + Join or Die combined edit to “Love Sosa” or something?

6B. Pete Eldridge Q.S.S.O.T.Y.

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If not for the desaturated HD and a spot that was built in the mid-2000s, Eldridge’s tobacco ad would have looked like lost line from Dan Wolfe’s Eastern Exposure 3. The best line since Carroll’s downtown L.A. one with the 360 shove / 360 flip in Fully Flared?

In #trendwatch2013 updates, expect a rise of cigarette visibility in skate footage throughout the next 18 months.

Bonus Mini 5 — Predictions For 2013:

5. An under-25 skater skates to a Drake song for a semi-prominent skate video in an “unironic” fashion.

4. Via the DGK video: Keychains remain on sneakers, frontside 5-0 front shove-it outs make a minor comeback, 12-to-15-year-olds attend more raves / wake up in more dumpsters, and there is somewhat of an increased tolerance of iPod headphones in skate footage for “hip-hop”-inclined skaters, thanks to Marcus McBride.

3. Via Gino in Pretty Sweet (redundant, yes): more Jordan Brand apparel, more trips to the JFK Banks, and more backside noseslide frontside 270 outs, even though the trick has been horrendous since its invention, minus that one time

2. One of the characters on HBO’s Girls has a sexual encounter with a broke skateboarder in the second season. It would probably have to be the annoying ex-roommate who works at a gallery because gallerys = free booze and free booze = skateboarders.

1. Nobody films a trick in Brooklyn Nets gear.

13 Comments

  1. #2 prediction happened in season one, I swear the hot roommates boyfriend was modeled after Poppalardo… He built stuff with wood, wore flannels, and looked just like Popps when he shaved his head…

  2. What if I want to go to the party for the season premiere of Girls at Andy’s girlfriend’s house. I’m a fantastic house guest

  3. A good prediction would be more Beasties tracks thru out 2013 in skateboarding, for multiple reasons. Pay homage.

  4. The Nets are just another example of losers moving to BK from NJ. And then they claim the boro as if they weren’t from the NJ. Its ok, I know where you from, and where you grew up. Then they get in to coke in their late 20s, early 30s. When I was bombing hills uptown, flying high around the BX since 93.. And where were you? Probably on tour with the Greatful Dead. And dont even think about throwing a Stretch tape on. That wouldnt be right, in your VW bus.


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