“If Marc Johnson hadn’t waited until 2016 to move to Adidas, could his Fully Flared part have been 26 minutes long? Backed by corporate shoe money, could The End have offered more realistic pyrotechnics? If DGK had clung to the Reebok deal, could Parental Advisory have offered a Jay-Z cameo instead of Beanie Siegel?”
For a spot that has been around for so long, Columbus Park didn’t become the main only place people go if they leave L.E.S. Park until recently. There was Puleo’s INFMS line, A.V.E’s ollie over 5050, and the seminal 2002 “Ja$onwear Day” clip that may have been the second time the kinked ledge ever got waxed — but besides routine 2000s video appearances of the ledge, the spot was never a bustling nexus until now. In 2015, it clocked two major video enders, one magazine cover, a newly established A.B.D. docket of tricks done up the two block, and is the place you are most likely to see a group of semi-motivated skateboarders pointing iPhones at each other.
Truth be told, nobody did the line with a towel-in-hand as good as S.A.D. twenty years ago. Connor Champion already elevated the bottle-in-hand line by having said bottle switch hands depending on which stance he was skating. The canon of tricks in the rain is too deep to bother breaking into. (Actually no, Matt Schlager is the only entry there — sorry Duffy.) Andre Page looked cooler than you ever will skating in the snow. Even with 95% of modern skateboarders suppressing regrets that they never applied to fashion school — how fresh or #weird of an outfit could you possibly have to leave an imprint in the jaded viewer’s mind c. 2015?
As we descend deeper towards PornHub levels of skateboard content, the spice rack of how to liven an everyday trick is getting slimmer. There aren’t many shortcuts to our memory bank because we’ve seen everything.
According to the EPA, the average American produces 4.4 pounds of garbage a day, which tallies to 1,600 pounds of garbage a year. That trash ends up in a landfill and is sadly not used for #creative purposes. We have skated over garbage for as long as the ollie has been around, and even on garbage for as long as conceptual web videos have existed. But what about with garbage? We’re constantly being called “garbage” by the women in our lives, so why not begin to embrace it?
In 2015, the easiest way to pierce into the short-term-memory-loss-laden brain of your average guy who watches skating on the internet is to skate with some trash stuck under your board. There are plenty of lloonngg back lips to go around, but it has been years since we’ve remembered one that didn’t have a piece of newspaper wedged under the wheels. And what other explanation is there for the fact that after 68 minutes of Love Park lines in Sabotage 4, two of the most memorable ones incorporated litter?