On Skateboarding As Sport As Stupid — The 2017 Dime Glory Challenge

Words & Photos by Zach Baker

As the cloud of loud begins to dissipate from the stimulation of last week’s festivities up in Montreal, it is time to reflect. Tony Soprano once said, “I feel like King Midas in reverse, everything I touch turns to shit.” Since their inception, the Dime boys have proven to be a bunch of full-blown regular ass speed King Midases. There has not been a single public offering — be it a bowling montage, full-length skate video, a collab baby, or any of the annual skateboarding competitions to which they’ve played host the past three years — that has not gone off without a hitch. But this year’s Glory Challenge, with the newfound aide of DC Shoes, was more frivolous than anyone anticipated. DC, recently reclaimed by one of its original co-founders, weighed in hard with their trademark mountain of money, bringing the spectacle to a new echelon. We’re talking renting Wade D. a Ferrari and a helicopter for an Instagram post, a pyrotechnics exhibition that was described as “a buffet of fire,” renting ten limos to go bowling, and throwing a carnival-esque block party DJed by Darude that felt like a billionaire kid’s freakin’ quinciñera. These and every other tiny, speed shade-tinted detail amount to, from where I’m standing, the most expensive joke ever.

This long weekend of overstimulation has left us still unpacking all that happened. So these guys went out, invested all this effort, capital, manpower, organization…for…a joke? It took these boys the better part of a year to plan. Bryan worked tirelessly for weeks on end to construct the many rooms and modifiable obstacles of this year’s Glory Challenge. Legends like Tiago, Biebel, Kalis and Forrest Edwards were flown from the extremes of the continent to be in attendance…for a weekend of laughs? Listen — I’m no Miscavage, I don’t have all the answers — but the spectacle has left thousands of people at once psyched, inspired, shocked, and confused.

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