‘It may look like a skatepark, but you can’t skate here’

If you live in/around New York, or visited here in the past two months, you have inevitably tried to skate the new Seaport spot at least a dozen times. What brand of logic decides to build something covered in one obstacle completely inherent to skateparks (ledges with flush metal lips that only appear on the exterior of the planter, not the part facing the dirt), only to prohibit the activity that it is best-suited for (even indirectly), is beyond anyone’s wild guess. The most useful recent analogy has equated the existence of this spot to building a basketball court in the middle of downtown Manhattan, and placing security there to kick people out whenever they show up to play ball.

The guards at this specific spot have also had the audacity to suggest that we go to “that park under the Manhattan Bridge.” Even with the imperfect ground, this park is better than any skatepark in New York, except maybe Astoria.

In light of the inane rules that govern this place, and the elaborate narratives as to why you cannot skate a place covered in architecture that otherwise exists for the sole purpose of skateboarding, here is a comprehensive list of excuses the people in charge of security here have used (i.e. people whose entire employment derives from kicking out skateboarders.) Please feel free to add any lies that you have been told to emphasize how stupid they look.

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Tropical Storm Bloomberg Links

Well, that was fun. Bloomberg just might end up looking like the boy who cried wolf next time there’s a serious weather threat. In case you missed it, check out our post of 10 hurricanes better than Irene. That photo up top was stolen from The New York Times‘ Irene gallery.

It’s easy to imagine Kennedy Cantrell and Matt Militano being inevitable local favorites whenever the Slap One in a Million goes down in New York. Are they old enough to get into Le Bain is the real question though.

Rick Howard + The song from the drunk scene in Mean Streets = Must post, even if everyone has already seen it.

If J. Crew insists on making a “Tompkins pant,” there is an issue of when Tompkins’ principal shareholders and Board of Trustees can expect to start receiving their dividends. (There also appears to be a Ludlow suit, hopefully J. Crew doesn’t disregard this issue too long, otherwise, it’s bound to turn into a class action lawsuit from the Ludlow Street Drunks and the Tompkins Square Park Skaters.)

Brian Delatorre landed a spot on the Habitat roster. Here’s his new Firing Line.

Last week, someone frontside nosegrinded down the Black Hubba. This week, somebody backside flips over it in a clip by recent Richmond, VA expatriates.

Piro Sierra 5050s that gigantic rail in The Bronx by Lincoln Hospital at 0:29 in this Naysayer Skateboards clip. Take him to the Rutgers Newark 18-stair rail next. And since we’re talking about The Bronx, watch this clip of Olu Stanley shredding to “(Still) Not a Player.”

Before the iPhone killed off the VX1000, there was a smartphone manufacturer called “Blackberry.” Below is a clip filmed by Emilio Cuilan on his Blackberry, dating from 2007 to 2009, and featuring Ty Lyons, Billy McFeely, Black Dave, Kevin Tierney, Yaje, and a bunch of other TF people.

There’s a new spot across the street from C.I.A. (next to the Starbucks), in the form of a short manual pad off a low drop. It’s a two-second bust, but someone’s going to get footage on it.

Quote of the Week:Seinfeld is about life before cell phones.” — Matthew Mooney

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Links for a Rainy Monday (Bulls in 6)

The upcoming week’s forecast looks pretty nice. Six straight days of rain. That shouldn’t stop you from skating though, especially if you’re unemployed, or your hours of employment are from 10 P.M. to 4 A.M.

The Flipmode affiliates have put together a four-minute throwaway clip to one of Big L’s more famously vulgar outings. “You know, they built you guys a skatepark so you wouldn’t skate here.”

A reel of Billy McFeely’s footage from the Caviar video, raw and without the music.

Torey Pudwill would be more exciting if he continued this trend of simple trick based, quick set-up lines on actual skate spots instead of kickflip back lip to back tailslide kickflip outs on ledges behind chain stores. With that being said, Plan B opting for the simpler, more stylish route on the promo makes us hope that the actual part would be more in that vein, and that’s certainly welcome.

Adam Abada’s journey through Europe on his skateboard. It’s not a journey from Milan to Minsk, but few have been so ambitious.

They can’t wait to start kicking you out of this thing. (Yes, it’s in midtown. And yes, it has been put in place of another former skate spot.)

This is so corny. (Has no relation to skateboarding.)

Quote of the Week:That ad [on Spring Street and Broadway] reminds me of the last time I did acid and why I will never do it again.” — Anonymous Degenerate

Quartersnacks is approaching the one year mark since it relaunched as an organized, frequently updated website. Looking towards the future, we are definitely interested in any suggestions or ideas that people who visit the website may have for things they’d like to see, new features, etc., so please feel free to share them in the comments. (Please don’t say “iPhone app.”) In the meantime, help us get to 1,000 followers on Twitter, so we look like we have clout over there. And add us on Facebook so you can see when updates go down.

From Seattle to Pink Houses

Have you seen the forecast for Tuesday night into Wednesday yet? Seven to twelve inches overall. Should be fun.

Film Me, the summer 2010 video that came before Goin’ Ham’ from the same crew, is available in its full forty-minute form on Vimeo.

Some real nineties-looking footage. The video says it’s from 1993-1994, or “around the time when people started skating switch.” You can see the barren asphalt wasteland that Battery Park City was prior to the completion of construction some years later, The Humps (or at least the spot I think was The Humps), and the nineties version of Midtown.

The final update from the Autumn Bowl. It’s been a wrap for a minute now, but just in case you wanted visual proof of its final state. Here’s a clip from the final two days as well. But according to Forrest Edwards, “It’s not like you get paid a million dollars to skate transition.”

This Keith Hufnagel-channeling clip of Zach Moore is about a year old, but a solid watch largely due to to the speed with which he skates through things.

Mama’s Boys is an upcoming local video that has a Loose Trucks Max part, you can watch the promo here, and a few New York-set throwaway clips here.

The nollie off the hip to boardslide down the rail in Pat Gallaher and Jack Olson’s shared part in the Flow Trash video is pretty official.

As a follow up to our new street plazas post from November…there’s a new street gap on Maiden Lane down the hill from C.I.A. (foot and a half high ledge over seven or eight feet of sidewalk into the street), and the new Grace Ledge is black marble, over four stairs, and lower (although still closed off for construction.)

Quote of the Week:Yo Dre, what are you doing?” — Inquisitive Gentleman
I have been sitting here watching the ‘Ride’ video for hours and don’t feel like I have wasted a second of my day.” — Andre Page

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