Tompkins locals are no strangers to the evil of the Parks Department. For years, they’ve been stealing our boxes, taping off our benches, and sometimes, they’d try to sabotage the park’s longest standing obstacle, The Crack™. But in the true spirit of American infrastructure, these slapdash concrete fill-ins never lasted long. All they would do is render the park a pebble-ridden, wheelbite-inducing mess for a week. Mother nature’s gift to skateboarding by way of a tree root attempting to free itself from the ground was too strong for these fascist acts of aggression.
This week, they went for big one. The Crack™ is gone. It has been filled with an effective tarlike substance that renders the inch-wide cavity obsolete. New York skateboarding’s inner Ben Sanchez is struggling for air.
Sophomores and juniors may be familiar with our orientation guides to Tompkins Square Park. Given the fast-but-not-too-fast pace of T.F. culture, we have only seen it fit to update the guide bi-annually. With college back in session, you guys can take everything in the 2013 edition as up-to-date, save Example F about the crack. Disregard it entirely, lest you arrive to Tompkins and find yourself shocked that there is nothing to skate at New York’s most famous skate spot.
We will be organizing meet-ups with psychiatric health professionals at Mamani’s for those who may need counseling in this time of crisis.