A.K.A. “The Events That Defined New York Skateboarding in 20__” Yeah, after three years, we figured that title might be a bit too wordy.
If you’ve been reading this website since at least last December, you know what’s going on here. If not, this is our concession to the internet’s annual list season, which we celebrate by chronicling the best bits of minutiae to occur in New York throughout the past year. Old editions — 2012: 25-21, 20-16, 15-11, 10-6, 5-1 / 2011: 25-21, 20-16, 15-11, 10-6, 5-1 / 2010: 25-21, 20-16, 15-11, 10-6, 5-1 / 2000s: 100-91, 90-81, 80-71, 70-61, 60-51, 50-41, 40-31, 30-21, 20-11, 10-2, #1.
25. A Chinatown Laundromat Creates the Most Adorably Futile Skateboarder Deterrent Ever
Did these people really think that northeastern skateboarding’s most beloved obstacle would become less appealing if they scrawled on it in bright yellow broken English? Did they realize it would become the most oft-Instagrammed object in all of New York skateboarding this year? Though it is not among the ranks of New York’s most prominent cellar door spots, this Delancey Street laundromat likely had a frustrating year in understanding why their prohibitive paint job wasn’t working.
Photo via Mike Heikkila on Instagram
Whether you’re looking for convenience, are drunk or just a derelict, Citibikes changed some facet of your life this year. This includes things pertinent to skateboarding, as docking stations became an opportunity for novel skate spots (above), regular skate spots were re-appropriated into Citibike spots, and taking the bridge to skate Brooklyn got a lot quicker.
Shout out to the stolen Citibike that got left at Tompkins and 12th & A for an entire weekend this summer, and to whoever got stuck with that bill.
23. Moment of Silence For Shirtless Handrail Tricks in Leather Jackets, Welcome Aboard Shirtless Handrail Tricks in Varsity Jackets
The Piss Drunx wore out any novelty there was to be had in draping one’s bare torso with a leather beer rag, and jumping down a set of stairs. So, it came as a shock that Tyshawn Jones flipped the shirtless jacket combo on its head, by utilizing a racing jacket for his handrail maneuver. The trick is equally an update, a homage and a remix. (Especially considering rocker points aren’t even a thing anymore, unless you’re trying to get into Cabin at 3 A.M. to meet some girl who loves pills.) It also stands as the most important fashion move by a skater under the age of sixteen in recent history.
22. Akira Mowatt Films an Entire Part in Sweatpants
Beyond benchmark first “official” parts from Akira and Rob Campbell, and first-part-in-a-long-time parts from Leo Gutman and German Nieves, Jeremy Elkin’s Brodies video hit an unexpected benchmark by featuring the first-ever video part filmed ENTIRELY in sweatpants and sweatshorts. The office favorite would have to be the Gold Wheels faux-Gucci sweats.
21. Eric Koston Makes a Bold Statement
Conversations about the differences between New York and L.A. are endless:
“Fool, I get way more space for the rent I pay.”
“Yo, but I don’t have to own a car, b.”
“Fool, the weather…”
“Yo, but I like seasons because I can focus on art and Netflix in the winter, b.”
“Fool, every pretty All-American blonde girl in the country moves here to have her dreams crushed when she finds out she won’t be the next Taylor Swift.”
“Yo, but I like Dominican girls anyway, b.”
“Fool, the schoolyards.”
“Yo, the T.F., b.”‘
Etc, etc, etc.
However, if there is one aspect of living in Los Angeles that New Yorkers have always embraced (aside from Sand Gaps), it’s In-N-Out. The “first thing off the plane” Instagram shot of an In-N-Out burger is old at this point.
Leave it up to Eric Koston — a prominent Los Angeles skateboarder who skated to the most excessively on-the-nose song about Los Angeles ever made — to proclaim what “unbiased” food critics have recently began contending…that New York’s Shake Shack is better than Los Angeles’ In-N-Out.
Bonus Mini 5 — Top Five Spots of 2013:
5. T.F. West
4. Reggaeton Ledges. This spot sucks, but you can’t help but admire its ability to trap people into thinking it’s good day after day. There is also a theory that people who live nearby are being paid under the table by the owners of Commodore to entice their Manhattan friends into coming here (“Take a Citibike over”), knowing they’ll end up at their bar after leaving this spot.
3. The re-opened foot-high ledge at Columbus Circle. Only bust-free spot in midtown?
2. The metal trash can nipple at T.F.
1. Virtual Reality Bump