Remember my prediction? Well, I was right. Burr!

If there’s one thing missing from summer 2009, it is the true presence of an anthem that was drawn from the pool of mainstream acceptance. In 2008, we had “Whatever You Like” and “Lollipop,” which in all their excellence and absurdity have gone down as significant artifacts of summer culture.

This summer, we had a bunch of idiots basing their careers off Kanye West’s scarf collection singing about lonely stoners and Andy Griffith theme songs. Sure, Lady Gaga has become a QS favorite thanks to Switch Mike’s endless rotation of her album while doing 110 miles per hour on the Atlantic City Expressway, but she is disqualified based on the fact that she is not a rapper from the south, and “Surf Party” became a benchmark for black people’s aspirations in reverse irony, but it failed to become a staple of mainstream America, and unfortunately, you will never be able to turn on Z100 and hear it (although I’m sure it will become a Monday and Wednesday nights at Lit classic within a few months.)

Since “Surf Party” will never make its way to oldies stations in 2035 (or whatever incarnation of radio exists then) the same way “Whatever You Like” and “Lollipop” will inevitably become CBS FM classics in years to come, we need to desperately grasp for something that will encompass the entire summer, and be relatable to anyone outside the fifteen to twenty people blasting “Surf Party” outside their cars in New York this summer, or the few heterosexuals that can sincerely say they enjoy Lady Gaga songs.

I am nominating “Wasted.” It was on the radio, and it was ignorant, so it is a win-win. It might not make its way to the oldies category thirty years from now, but it would get pretty close.

Case in point, J.P. Blair put together a clip featuring a bunch of summer ’09 footage to the aforementioned tune (although it is the inferior O.J. the Beverly Hills Chihuahua version).

Features Black Dave, Billy Mcfeely, Richard Quintero, AJ Nagy, Adrian Vega, Jersey Dave, BK, Shaun Webber, Jason Carroll, Sam Cartright, Matt Daniels, Kevin Tierney, Sean Colello, and Brian Clarke.

Related: Quartersnacks Summer ’09 — The Ignorant Edit

Bonus Quote of the Week: “These girls are the worst. They go to bars on East Broadway and then get mad when a Rican in an Affliction shirt starts dancing with them.” – DJ Roctakon

Embedded after the jump.